This Week In Bat Shit-Insanity w/ Paris Hilton and Todd Barry
Tuesday, March 4, 2008 at 08:53PM These days since Lets Get Tight has blown up, I've had a hard time churning out what usually flowed out unwillingly. The golden post. Well fuck it, today I'm going to write about this week in bat shit insanity.
It's rumored that Paris Hilton has been spotted wandering around in Hollywood with a Buddhist Monk. She was in a book store with him, he was dressed in complete orange and reading some book about how to walk the Zen Buddhist line. Upon further investigation, it turned up that the guy is an actor who was in "My Name is Earl" and "Pirates of the Carribean". If you're a movie buff, you probably know the guys name. If not, it's Maxie Santillan. I can't tell you weather or not I am bummed about this or if I think it's hillarious. On one hand, you have Paris Hilton who is a fucking complete balloonhead wandering the streets trying to fool the idiots in Hollywood that she's dropping the party girl thing. On the other hand, you have her going shithouse at some club in LA talking about how she wants to suck, lick, and fukkk everything she sees. (Made known to me by our friend Nicky Digital.) Which is it? I don't care really, as long as she keeps hiring D-list actors to help her clean up her image (I'm a C-list actor, maybe she'll pick me next?)
One legitemate question for the readers though... If making a sex video propels you to instant fame, then where in the hell is my fame? You think I dress in a pizza delivery man outfit on weekends for kicks?? (Please contact my agent at Phillip.Glocken@gmail.com)
In other news, you might recognize this comedian from when you log into myspace to see if that girl you met the other night was down to fuck or if she was just hammered. (Fingers crossed!) There's a new style of comedy these days. You have real thinkers in the game that entertain the shit out of people and don't reduce themselves to cheeseball impersonations like Robin Williams (sorry dude, it gets annoying in like 14 seconds) or that fucking poor excuse for a half hour of excruciating television that is Frank TV. There's people who will geniunely blow your mind or make you laugh over and over again. Among these people is this weeks Myspace Featured Comedian. His name is Todd Barry and he's fucking hillarious. If you're not a jackass or one of those people who claims to never watch tv, you might remember him from his stellar performance as "Todd" (the third Conchord) on HBO's Flight of the Conchords. (Or if you watched Sex and the City, you might recognize him from there too. Don't liken him to the 4 pounds of ice cream you ate while you watched the show, that's your fault. NOT HIS.)
Two weekends ago, I went to his place to interview him for Record Junkie. He's got a cd that came out today called "From Heaven". Honestly, this shit is pure gold. He's a solid dude and I'm not going to give away any of the details of the interview for Record Junkie but I will say, he's one of the only people who could really put me in my place. He's cool as fuck too, he hangs out with The New Pornographers and Yo La Tengo. Do yourself a favor and buy his CD. You can find it on ITunes or in your local record store. If they don't have it, tell them that I said I will crush them like a fine powder, snort them, and then chat someone's ear off for an hour.. after which I will feel broken and go to my house to hang out in the dark.
Another retarded scheme by a Hollywood whore in the same week as a new brilliant CD from one of our favorite stand up comedians? There is some balance to the world after all.
Check this out, you'll love it.
And Todd does Sesame Street!!!
Todd, keep killing it! For more about Todd check out his website.
Reader Comments (2)
seriously, I don't get it. I mean, its kinda funny, but not holy shit insane funny - not even a little. :(
freelance writer